Before and After

Tonight out of the blue I had a message from JH.
He is my friend from a golden time gone by when I was super happy, confident, full of fun and laughing all the time.

A time that existed before I tried to be more.
Of course I tried to be more for all of the right reasons only I didn’t realise quite how naive I was in my imaginings of what that world would be and who I would find in it.
I’m less naive now and Ive learnt a very costly and life crushing lesson.

But tonight when JH took me to Mick and Keith”s corner shop in Carnaby Street I was reminded how much more  Stella  I was before I entered that world than I ever have been after.
And that feels like a helpful realisation in finding a road to somewhere better.

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