On Monday, late at night, I stood alone outside in my garden, in the dark, looking up at the stars.
I was thinking about Light and Dark. Battles and Peace.
Standing there for a long while under a clear dark sky where those famous clusters were so very visible. But instead I found myself searching for the stars that were hidden amongst them. The harder I looked the more I found. And a couple of times I saw those almost invisible stars shoot through the sky, and then like far away fireworks fizzle and sparkle.
Did that happen or was it my eyes playing tricks? Who knows. But it didn’t really matter. What I saw was so beautiful and along with the Light version in my ears, created such a beautiful and powerful surge of wonder from deep within me, as I felt the enormity and power of the universe beyond. A natural creation of depth of feeling within myself, inspired by the extraordinary natural force beyond.
Sometimes it only takes a single breath, a tiny movement, with a moment of complete magic, to find myself feeling more. Even if it is momentarily.
That’s the thing when you are constantly battling. You never get a chance to really stop and feel how far you’ve come or how much you have changed until you just stop and breathe.
I am breathing. Quietly. On my own. A very slow and gradual process in feeling me. A me that has evolved and grown. Grown in a way that is starting to make me feel more. My version of more.
I have so much love for the people who matter to me. Thinking of them as I looked up at the stars.
Peaceful space allows me to feel. Whether that be through watching a cloud float in the sky, or feeling the suns warmth as it pours in on me through my window as I read, or hearing and smelling the rain as I stand in my garden, or touching the soft and comforting purple fur throw that I wrap myself in, as I cosy up alone and watch films. Gradually feeling my stress begin to subside in just being able to quietly exist.
Believing in the quiet power and beauty of my girl who is out there fighting for herself, knowing that I am just a heartbeat away. Love travels
Noticing as I looked in the sky that the most beautiful stars for me weren’t the biggest and most visible. They were the hidden ones that caught the eye of someone who always looks beyond. Seeing them sparkling in all their invisible magic.
Life is like the greatest love. It’s easy to fall in love when it’s perfect and beautiful. The effortless version that requires very little and is filled with so much visible brightness and big promise. Its when the going gets tough and battles have to be fought that it is really tested. Seeing exactly what it is really made of. But when it does survive it provides a whole different and more meaningful reason to fall in love all over again.
That’s the path of life that I’m beginning to walk along.