The Mosh Girl

Christmas Angels come in all shapes and sizes and this mornings was a tall elegantly dressed and handsome black man who I would say was in his mid fifties and stopped me as I was walking back to my car after coming out of the pound shop. I was carrying  all sorts of little bits and pieces that make other little bits and pieces that I’ve bought on a budget, feel a little more special for the people I love. It’s the thought that counts and I’m full of them right now. Trying to replace my own thoughts of disappointments and sadness with things that might make a difference  to others beyond me. I’ve had different moments of life when I’ve not been treated  so nicely or in a way I deserve. But I’m realising that it says more about them than it does about me. 
“Look at you, looking so gorgeous in your cool outfit with your cool vibe” he said. He looked pretty cool  himself in all his thoughtful and confident angel. Providing me with a moment of feeling like a person too in a way that I really needed  and felt really nice. In my more confident times I think I would have given him a  big hug  for being so nice to me but with restrictions, my lesser confidence and arms full of stuff I  smiled back and said “Oh Thankyou. That’s so nice” and walked to my car smiling and feeling like a somebody. What a lovely gift that didn’t even cost a pound. I like to think that he was sent to me in that moment this morning to remind me of my purpose in this world even if that was just having a cool vibe! I’ve never been cool in my life but in his eyes I was. How lovely! 
It’s so easy to say that I should give that to myself but when so much time has been spent trying to give to others who have needed it more than me,  and so much stuff has come my way that hasn’t been made of perfect, it often feels enough to just try to keep going and feel like I’m not just a disposable extra in a world where more is often seen as more. It is nice to be noticed. Even for a brief moment. Especially by a lovely someone who saw that more about me too. Christmas sparkle just in that. Thankyou Angel! 
With a whole lot more sparkle added on top in spending time this afternoon with my two besties who I treasure so much and never ever let me down and I know will always be there. Warm cosy fun at its very finest. And a massive reminder in how lucky I am in them and the other beautiful people I have in my life. A life that would feel less without them. 
And my song?… a little gift of memory to self, for the crowd surfing mosh girl covered in beer. 


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