I love my family.
Christmas Day full of real, in all its laughs and love and lots of lovely Christmas food lovingly prepared by my mum. No big presents given. All just little thoughtful things that might make someone smile or laugh. No pressure to have to give. Always tokens. It’s all in the thought as opposed to the designer must haves.
My friend talked about people having a brand. And what mine looked like. I’ve seen some learning at work about self branding. Who and what and how we need to brand ourselves for success. Only I don’t really care about creating a version beyond the real one. Preferring to stick with the natural brand that just is what it is. Realising how different that brand can look depending on where I am and who I am with, and what parts of myself can exist more easily in different versions in different ways. Knowing some people might appreciate some elements of myself more than others. The girl who often exists in isolation in all my own childlike imagination can very easily look like a fish out of water when surrounded by this company. Although my mum always gets it.
This version exists in all its easy going, nothing fancy, have a laugh which also comes with lots of heart and lots of invisible presents. Some might describe that invisibility as blessings but in my mums house it’s a version of blessings that I would describe as laughs. But it’s nice to have a little combination of everything. I show my love in all sorts of different ways. At Christmas and birthdays I like to give gifts. Little things and to people who mean something to me.
In all the blessings of those laughs there is never an intention to offend anyone, but there is also no walking on egg shells either. Lines like “she’s a big old unit” would send the feminists out there spinning into a frenzy. This is old style say it like you see it and where any sensitivity has to be put aside in being able to take a joke. It’s what I grew up in and where you need to be able to give as good as you get. But none of it is malicious. All my strange and dreamy little ways can easily leave me as a perfect target for laughs so I tend hold that version back a little more as I talk and instead provide the down to earth version that can hold her own. I mean in moments where I do share something more “dreamy” without thinking, I feel the energy rise in the room in providing them with a gift for comedy. But I’ve heard it all before and it doesn’t bother me. Although I have also learnt how to switch off when it reaches that point of them getting carried away in their entertainment and not knowing when to stop. Everyone has a limit to how much they want to be the joke but I always know that it isn’t meant to hurt me. It’s just easy laughs. In fact I know I’m very well loved by them. I’m the soft and gentle one who likes chatting with others about all sorts. But of course it can get a bit tiring sometimes when the whole room are laughing at me. They just don’t really get some of my ways and anything that is a bit floaty is seen as woolly. “Keep it Real” being the way things flow. An element that is part of my root of which I understand in all its subtleties. Humour being a massive part of this world. I could imagine that some women would probably be offended after five minutes. But everyone is fair game. And “don’t give it out if you can’t take it”. You’ll get slaughtered. I have certainly learnt through my youf in how to give it right back to them in moments, in a way I would never do to others beyond. Knowing that often beyond, people know how to give it out but struggle more in taking it. It is a safe place to be able to laugh at each other which often feels like a welcome relief for me in a world that can often feel so serious now in so much “triviality”. What can you say now? I can’t even keep up. So I find it easier to say nothing despite the fact that I have really good bones, take as I find, happy to be friends with anyone as long as you are nice to me and mine, always have good intentions and I wouldn’t wish to hurt or exclude anyone. Just come as you are.
Towards the end of the day when I was tired I felt a little pummelled, as everyone was laughing at all my new hopes and dreams that were given a comedy fuelled vote of no confidence. Gotta have a plan I was told. But what do they know? Reminding them that for me it’s all about giving things a go, and enjoying the adventure along the way. Be nice to succeed but it’s not my driver. Because maybe it might make me happy while I’m on the way. A comment that resonated a little for a about a second, in a day which provided everyone with some much needed fun and laughs and warmth and kindness and Love. Did it look like the perfect Christmas versions that I see on those tv adverts? Absolutely nothing like that. But did everyone feel at home in it? In all its imperfect, unflashy, down to earth, on a budget version where no one dressed up other than me in my sparkly dress, where no party games were played, with no expensively decorated table with candelabras and name placers … but a lovely well cooked turkey, mums home made stuffing and the best roasties ever … absobloodylutely!!!! A little ceremony but with a lightness of touch.
And that’s a brand for me, that for me that creates Easy Company.